From the night that covers me, black as the well from pole to pole, I thank the gods that they may be, for my unconquerable soul. In the raging clutch of circumstances, I have not winced or cried out loud. Under the blows of chance my head is bloody, but firm. Beyond this place of anger and tears looms, but the horror of the shadow, and yet the threat of the years finds me and will find me without fear. No matter how narrow the door, how loaded with punishments the parchment, I am the master of my destiny: I am the captain of my soul.

The previous poem, Invictus, was written by an English poet named William Ernest Henley in the late 1800s and appeared in a recent film of the same name. The term Invictus has its roots in Latin, which means undefeated. The film, directed by Clint Eastwood and starring Morgan Freeman as Nelson Mandela during his presidential term in post-apartheid South Africa, is essentially a story of unconditional forgiveness. As part of Mandela’s passionate quest to unite and heal a country divided and torn by racial lines, the South African leader fought to host the 1995 Rugby World Cup. A poignant flashback scene shows Mandela during his incarceration period in Robben Island, reading the above poem from a piece of paper inside his prison cell.

In the film’s version of events, Mandela shares the poem with Springbok captain Francois Pienaar (played by Matt Damon) before the World Cup, when racial tensions rise and the team’s chance of victory seems, in doubtful at best. The game of rugby had a large majority of white fans and blacks (many of whom saw the Springboks as a symbol of apartheid), rallied to disconnect the team. During a private teatime chat in the Capital building, Mandela’s passion to save the Springboks from their impending demise prompts the previously hesitant Pienaar, ultimately helping him lead his team to victory. and to unite a country on the brink of civil war.

Freeman, with his lovingly gentle yet authoritative presence, makes us believe that he is the real Mandela while eloquently delivering memorable proverbs throughout the film: Forgiveness frees the soul was my personal favorite. A similar Mandela quote offers rich food for thought on this dawn of a new year: because being free is not simply shedding chains, but living in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others. How true is this! It is not rocket science, and yet most of us tend to forget this simple truth.

We do not advance in life being critical, critical, or closed-minded. We do not prosper by harboring resentment or by being vindictive. When we practice tolerance, compassion and acceptance, we satisfy those parts of ourselves that yearn for the same. Forgiveness doesn’t even require a specific action or a personal encounter; rather, it is an internal process of spiritual healing. Through forgiveness we shape our destiny by exchanging bad energies for good ones, releasing emotional toxins and expanding the heart. To forgive others, we must first forgive ourselves. To forgive ourselves we must forget regret and embrace the past: the good, the bad, and the ugly. Without our past, we would not be who we are and where we are today. Everything that has happened so far, no matter how painful or unpleasant, had to happen to get us to where we are today.

Who is the captain of your soul? The New Year is a perfect time for self-reflection and brutal honesty. Where have you been and where are you headed? Is it moving in a positive direction or is it time to change course? Much of life is a random circumstance, and yet our personal choices are endless. Chance moments and purposeful foresight are intricately woven through the fabric of our lives; a complex interplay of chance and intention that forms the colorful matrix of defining moments that shape our destiny. Where do we humans end and where does destiny begin? These questions baffle even the sharpest minds. So many famous poems, quotes, books and movies ponder these universal puzzles.

We live in a world of opposing forces: yin and yang, man and woman, good and evil, darkness and light. How do we find order in chaos? In a world where bad things happen to good people, where an innocent man is imprisoned for no crime greater than the color of his skin, where wars rage and airplanes fall from the sky and bloodshed forms the curtain of background of entire cultures, bitterness and cynicism lurk. Around every corner. And yet embedded in the chaos of our daily lives is the gift of the human spirit. Strong but vulnerable, humble but proud, beautiful but imperfect. Bad things happen every day, but it is our choice how to respond.

I am the master of my destiny: I am the captain of my soul. As you accept the promise of a new year, ask yourself: Am I the master of my destiny? I am the captain of my soul? If you hold on to past anger, resentment, or regrets, you haven’t yet experienced the liberating and reaffirming pulse of unconditional forgiveness. There is an old saying, sorry but don’t forget. It is important to remember the past, but if we spend too much time there, we lose the present moment and do not realize our immediate surroundings. Tomorrow is too late to capture the ephemeral essence of today, so take a deep breath, chart your course and sail towards a whole new horizon.