My biggest breakthroughs with binge eating occurred when I really understood that I had to change my internal perceptions, not external behaviors.

Because perceptions drive behaviors, it’s like a ninja move.

So the next question is, how do you change your perception?

There are 3 main things that I have found work for me to change my perceptions.

One of the best ways I have found is to do things that are radically outside of my normal habits, routines, or behaviors. When I do this, I return to familiar routines, but I have altered my perception a bit.

That could mean enjoying my favorite food with candlelight, music, etc. and making a big event out of it. Or it could mean finding a homeless shelter and serving soup on a rainy afternoon. Or go to a workshop to meet new people, to surround myself with different ideas. Whatever it is, I know that when I am stagnating, I need to be responsible for changing my state so that I can change my thoughts. Usually the easiest state to alter is the physical state, because emotional states can be much more difficult to manipulate.

Second, I had to honestly give myself compassion and permission to eat what I really wanted. I started by allowing myself a week to eat what I wanted, with the guideline of eating when I was hungry and noticing when it subtly felt like “enough.” Like everything, this takes practice. I go through ups and downs with this, but I remind myself that I am human. Now, I tend to stick to the same healthy breakfasts and lunches. For dinner or dessert, I pick one thing I really want and look forward to that at the end of the day. I only keep about 2 nights worth of this in my house, so I can’t get too much into a hole.

Third (the longest and most difficult), I have been involved in self-help materials and courses long enough to realize that I am more than my body. It sounds cliché, but this is a problem.

Relating to yourself as someone uniquely gifted to contribute to the world brings your focus to a bigger playing field. Food can be a comfortable distraction that keeps you playing a smaller game. It’s easy to get wrapped up in punishing yourself. The alternative is to go out into the world as the best version of yourself, acting as if any day could be your last. Saying what’s really in your heart, figuring out how to do what you’ve dreamed of but never thought you’d actually do. These things consume more time, energy and thoughts than thinking about food.

Is there something exciting for you that is new or out of the ordinary that you could try this week to shake things up a bit?