When you were in school, intelligence was measured by your grade on a history test or a math test. Some colleagues were super smart and didn’t seem to have to work on anything. But there are times when I meet exceptionally intelligent people who seem clueless and slightly eccentric.

As I got older, I realized that the really successful people are those who know how to play. They network and interact well with others and design win-win situations. When you are in a business situation, no one cares what grades you got on your Bachelor’s Certificate. What they want to know is if you have the skills to do the job and are ready to put in the effort.

Daniel Goleman wrote a book titled “Why Emotional Intelligence Can Be More Important Than IQ” in 1995 and this has become a respected work on the subject. Self-awareness is at the heart of this theory. If we have a real knowledge of ourselves that empowers us to look for jobs that suit us, to use our skills to the best of our ability and avoid situations that are not going to be useful to us. Too many people decide to become doctors or lawyers because they get high marks in school and it is seen as something made to enter this profession. In fact, many physicians lack empathy and the examination system and training practice do not place enough emphasis on this important aspect.

When I go to visit the doctor I don’t care how many degrees he has or if he was the first of his kind I just want to know that they have the right knowledge to diagnose the problem and offer me some level of understanding / empathy. I refused to go back to a consultant who was brusque and rude to me, receiving 3 phone calls during our consultation. I thought that meant I was way down on his priority list. It is the same in any area of ​​life. People want to know that you have the knowledge to help them with their problem and that you care enough to want to help them.

When talking about emotional intelligence, the four main emotions are anger, bad, joy and sadness. We react to situations differently depending on the emotion that the scenario invokes in us. So if someone pulls up in front of me at an intersection, I might curse under my breath and gesture at them, but I have good sense not to get out of the car and start a full-scale line. If I did, I might get temporary satisfaction, but the guy might point a knife at me or give me a load of abuse and it’s just not worth aggravating me.

People who are aware of their emotions and the fact that they have certain triggers will probably recognize when they are upset and take a moment to try to calm down. Many people count to 10; This is difficult for me, but I am trying. As a result, I am less likely to get angry and say something that will make the situation worse. Of course, there are times when I feel compelled to challenge others (usually when the problem violates my values) and that’s okay too.

It’s great to be academically smart, but it’s also great to be aware of other people’s body language and reactions. Some people love to talk about their chosen topic, but cannot read the signs that the listener is not interested in what they have to say, for example. observing body language. Another aspect of emotional intelligence is being aware of how the group sees you and using that awareness effectively.